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The 5 worst things about being vegan

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This week marks two years since I went vegan.  I didn’t find veganism nearly as challenging as I’d expected.  However, being vegan isn’t all fresh salads and mushroom gravy.  There are a few sucky things that pop up when you adopt a vegan lifestyle. Let’s take a look at some of the not-so-awesome parts of veganism.

1. Eating Out

If you’re eating out with a group of non-vegans, you’re probably going to find yourself at a pub or restaurant that has few or no vegan dishes on the menu. While some restaurants are making more of an effort to include vegan options, most don’t.  And the ones that do tend not to attempt anything more adventurous than a salad. So you wind up having to sit there eating limp vegetables while your family all tuck into delicious meals.  Worse still is when there isn’t a single vegan option to be seen.  Then you have the distinctly yucky choice of having to go without a meal, or order something that’s got animal products in it.  I hate skipping meals, so I usually wind up choosing a vegetarian option and then feeling hugely guilty afterwards.

2. Foods that are almost-but-not-quite vegan

It’s happened more times than I can count.  I’m at the grocery store and I spot a yummy-looking snack on the shelf.  I pick it up and begin to scan the ingredients. Everything checks out and I feel elated that I can buy it and then my eye catches the word “milk solids” crammed at the bottom of the column.  I pop it back on the shelf and shuffle away, defeated.

There are so many products that are a whisker away from being vegan, were it not for one minor ingredient.  It’s so frustrating to know that were it not for that one sprinkle of whey powder, that tiny bit of tallow or the dash of milk, that product would be on your can-buy list.

3. Smart-arse vegan jokes

People love to make fun of vegans.  It’s socially acceptable to make jokes about preachy vegans.  Which really sucks because I know very few vegans who are pushy about the vegan lifestyle.  Most vegans I know keep to themselves, doing their own thing and leaving their omnivore friends alone.  Ironically, in my experience people who aren’t vegan are much more likely to try to convince a vegan to have a slice of bacon, or try to argue that “humans are meant to eat meat/ plants have feelings too/  you can’t possibly get enough protein on a vegan diet”.  It sucks to have to be the butt of the joke, while simultaneously fending off people who try to bait you into an argument about the food you choose to eat.

4. The lack of melty cheese

I have an almost obscene love of cheese.  The one non-vegan food I constantly crave is cheese.  There are some truly awesome vegan cheeses available, and I’ve tried lots of them.  But the one thing that most vegan cheeses don’t do is melt.  If you put them under the grill or in an oven, the slices bake into brittle cheesy twigs.

My favourite thing about cheese is it’s meltiness.  I love stretching strands of mozzarella as I bite into a piece of pizza.  I adore gooey melted parmesan atop a steaming bowl of pasta.  And that’s nothing compared to the liquid gold that is the humble cheese toastie.  I’m yet to find a vegan cheese that melts as satisfactorily as dairy cheese.  And that breaks my heart.

5. Nitpicky vegans

Sometimes, the worst thing about being a vegan is other vegans.  Now, don’t get me wrong, most vegans are fine. But there is a small group of perfectionist vegans that pride themselves on pointing out where other vegans are going wrong.  “Oh, I see that you’re still wearing leather” (well, yes.  I bought these shoes before I went vegan and it seems a waste to throw them away).  “Ohhh, you DO realise that the syrup on top of your caramel soy frappacino has butter in it, right?” (Nope, I didn’t even think of that).  “Wow, you still feed your pets meat?” (Yes, because they’d get sick on a plant based diet and that would be cruel).  Veganism is hard, and it’s very easy to slip up.  It’s also a lot to think about, not just food we eat but the clothing we wear, the cosmetics we use and the entertainment we consume.  I believe that each person is allowed to make their own choices.  If they want to give up meat but still eat dairy, that’s their choice.  If they want to keep wearing leather and wool?  Also their choice.  There are no Vegan Police to decide if you’re a good enough vegan, and it’s not up to anyone else to judge what your lifestyle should look like.  If you’re giving veganism a go at all, hats off to you for trying. And if not, that’s fine as well.

Are you a vegan?  What do you think are the worst parts of veganism?


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